Zoey's First Ten Days

Please Put Down the Camera!

Oh dear! What can I say? I get a little carried away with this Little Princess! I've been waiting a long time for a girl to dress up and play with! She has been so much fun. Zoey is a complete angel. She has only been waking up once in the night to eat, and also sleeps most of the day. She only fusses when she's hungry or needs to be changed. Her temperment is so sweet. She likes to just look around thoughtfully at her surroundings, and especially gazes at our family photos on the wall (which I know she shouldn't be able to see because they're more than 18 inches from her face, but seriously, how do they really know how far a baby can see without getting verbal responses?! I think she likes to look at her family.) I guess my only complaint is that she is tending toward cluster-feeding. So she'll want to eat every half hour or hour for a few hours, then she'll sleep for 2 to 4 hours. She also likes to be held and snuggled (which Zach didn't really care for), and sleeps better that way than when we lay her down. She mostly sleeps in her bassinett though.

I adore my Zachary, but he was such a hard baby, I about lost my mind. He had great difficulty eating and sleeping, and I was up around the clock. The poor darling screamed all the time. I couldn't figure it out then, but I now realize it was probably because he was starving and exhausted. I still feel so badly, both that I didn't know his needs and couldn't meet them, it breaks my heart! I prayed that subsequent babies would be a little easier, and so far, Heavenly Father has heard and answered my prayers! I'll gladly take them any way they come--even if they're colicky and difficult, but this has sure been a piece of heaven for us!

So here are the dozens of photos I have taken of her in the 10 days since she was born. I know they are far from professional. It makes me want a nicer camera and some more photo lessons, but it's better than nothing, right?! Sorry for the extensive pictures, but these are for all the relatives that live far away and likely won't see her for several months.



I can't believe I'm a mother of two now!



 

My Tiny Dancer!



She's just going to have to like big flowers and bows!



Her hair is looking redder and redder!

 

Her Aunt Missy crocheted this precious, softer-than-silk, hat, mitten, and cocoon ensemble. I adore it!



 

Zach is the most concerned, adoring big brother ever.

This is her Victoria's Secret pose!

Introducing Sweet Little Zoey!

She's here at last! And right on her due date! We are so happy to welcome little Zoey Elizabeth into our happy family! She was born Tuesday, February 22, 2011 at 6:01 am. She was 20 inches long and weighed 7 pounds 8 ounces- which surprised me because 2 weeks earlier the doctor said she was measuring 7 pounds 6 ounces on the ultrasound. I thought she'd easily be at least 8.5 pounds! I guess we all know not to trust those estimated measurements much! I think it's time for a new sonogram machine at my doctor's office, because he also said she had tons of hair visible on the ultrasound. I was expecting a hairy little monkey, but she just has a little bit, and it's light-brown with maybe some strawberry blonde highlights. We'll have to see what color it is as it grows out.

I don't want to jinx anything, but she has been a complete angel so far! I was hoping this would be the case, because it was so hard with Zachary. He couldn't figure out how to eat/I couldn't figure out how to feed him, thus, he didn't sleep much and screamed and cried all hours. It was so heart-breaking and difficult for us all! But Zoey seems to get the hang of eating--except it is still very painful for me as she completely learns how to latch on properly. And she sleeps all the time, which blows my mind, and for which I am most thankful. I have to wake her up in the night after 4+ hours of sleeping to eat--which NEVER happened with Zach. His first 4 hour stretch was at one month! She also rests on and off for most of the day. When she is awake, she hardly fusses. She just looks around thoughtfully. I know they say many newborns are just really sleepy the first few days, so I'm not going to get my hopes up too high that the great sleeping will last, but it has been a huge blessing already, as Corey and I have been able to catch up on all the lost sleep. I have had a chance to heal and Corey has been able to rest for his intense exam schedule (Did I mention he got a 100% on his test the day after her birth? He is both blessed and SMART!)

My sweet sister Natalie came out from Maui to both be my doula and help out with the kids before and after the birth. We have had so much fun, and I cannot imagine what I would have done without her assistance!

Happily snuggling my tiny right after her birth

Zach is so excited about her! He loves her to pieces already, and always wants to hold her.

Get ready for flowers and bows, Little Princess!

And pink and brown and polka dots, of course!

Doesn't she already pose like a Tiny Diva?!

We adore her, and feel so blessed that all went perfectly with the labor and delivery, resulting in a healthy, happy mother and baby!!!

Preggo Update- Like Anyone Wants Another One!

Just a quick update since my last hormonal drama about induction: I decided not to be induced--for now, at least--for a couple of reasons. First, Corey has assured me that he will be fine with school and most of his professors are pretty understanding. Second, after talking to a lot of people, I determined that it would likely be much more difficult to avoid pain meds if I were induced, because most methods bring on hard and strong contractions. I really hope to be able to deliver naturally, but if I don't make it all the way through without meds, at least I am going to try to wait it out and go into labor naturally. I think it is amazing to feel what it is like to go into labor unaided. They wanted to induce me with Zachary right after they turned him from breech to right-side-up, but I talked them into letting me go home and wait for him to come, for which I was very thankful. Another reason I didn't opt for the induction was that I didn't feel quite ready for all of it. It will come soon enough. I don't want to force her out before we're both ready! I also hadn't slept much the night before--what's new, right?

I love this little girl!

I'm feeling pretty good-almost too good for labor to be in the super-near future, possibly. I felt awful for a few days before I had Zachary. But who knows, though? That is the fun thing about babies coming--it is a total surprise when they decide to make their debut! I am so excited to meet her. I am sure there will be many struggles as I become accustomed to my new responsibilities. I am so grateful for my amazing husband who is such a wonderful help to me. I knew he would be a great father, but he has astounded me with his patience, love, and kindness. He is a model father, and I adore him! My children are so lucky to have him as their guide in this life, as am I. I am also so blessed with wonderful family who will be helping me out through this transition. We are so grateful for all your prayers.

On a different note, my sister, Natalie, flew in from Maui the other night--mostly because I was going to be induced last night. I feel bad for stealing she and her son away from her lonely husband when the delivery could still be a ways out, but it has really eased my mind to have someone here for when I go into labor. She is amazing and endured 28 hours of all natural labor with her child, so she will help coach me through and be my doula. Zach is pretty much enamored with her. He says, "I want my Natalie to rock me." : ) Today he also said, "Where is my Natalie?" I answered that she was cleaning in another room. Then he said, "Is she freaking you out?" I had to ask him to repeat himself, because I couldn't believe he had said that. Where did he get that?! I'm sure it has come from my lips, but I can't think of why he would apply it to that particular conversation! He is getting to the point where he expresses his own creative thoughts, and also applies crazy things we say and do to other situations. He cracks me up!

I LOVE this boy!

Also, some sweet women in my church threw me a baby shower last night. It was so much fun!! Baby girl items are just SO CUTE!!!!! I couldn't believe how spoiled I got! This girl is definitely going to be well-dressed, thanks to the generosity of so many people!

Pregnancy Update/Rant : )

Monday I went to the OB for my 38 week check. He did an ultrasound and said the baby was measuring about 7lbs 6oz and I wasn’t dilated at all. So that means that by the time she is born, if the measurements are accurate and she comes on time, she could easily be 1-2 lbs heavier!! While these measurements are just estimates, I tend to believe them because Zach was 8lbs, and subsequent babies are often larger than the first. It scared me a little! On the bright side, the heavier the baby is, the more weight I lose at the time of birth, right?!

Another thing the doctor said was that she has a lot of hair that he can see on the ultrasound. This is crazy to me, because Corey, Zach, and I, as well as all of my siblings and most of his, were mostly bald at birth. I imagine she’ll have dark hair, since I haven’t ever seen or heard of blonde babies being born with lots of hair. I could be totally wrong here, but has anyone else seen a blonde newborn with lots of hair? It seems that she’s got some of her daddy’s hirsute genes! I really expected Zach to have dark hair and eyes, and was sincerely surprised to see my fair, recessive genes win out. So the chances of this one also having my coloring are very slim. (Though I wouldn’t complain a bit if she looked just like Zach!)

On a completely different note, I’m going to discuss some childbirth options we are considering. I realize this is almost as taboo as discussing religion or politics, but I don’t intend to offend anyone. I am a huge proponent of natural childbirth. My feeling is that natural, unmedicated, non-surgical childbirth is the way God intended it, and our ancestors have been doing it fine for thousands of years. It is really something I want to do. To me, it is like a marathon. It takes strength, focus, stamina, and great determination to have a completely natural birth experience when modern medicine has added so many options to speed it up, numb the sensations, and so forth. Some people are interested in running marathons, and others are completely not. I do not have aspirations of ever running a marathon. I really got all the running I wanted in junior high track, thanks! But I really DO want a natural birthing experience. I want my body to go into labor naturally when the baby is ready. I want to use the breathing and relaxation techniques I have learned and practiced to deliver the baby without the aid of medications or anesthetics. I know many women do not feel this way, and that is fine. This is my marathon.

I was extremely disappointed not to have had a more natural experience delivering Zach. Labor started 3 days after his due date. After nearly 12 hours of 5 minute apart contractions, I demanded an epidural, then was bedridden and pumped so full of pitocin and IV fluids that I swelled up like the Pillsbury doughboy! I didn’t feel much, and finally delivered him 24 hours after labor began. It wasn’t a horrible experience, but I certainly wouldn’t call it enjoyable or anything like I had hoped it would be either. I was so swollen and exhausted when he came that I really couldn’t enjoy the moment much. And the next day was even difficult to enjoy as I was numb on one side for another 8 hours or so and sick of being poked, prodded, and having my rest interrupted by the hospital staff.

So here’s my dilemma: Beginning on the baby’s due date, Corey has a test every day for the next 8 days. The best-case scenario for his success at school would be for me to not give birth until after these tests are complete so he has time and energy to study. When she comes, he will just want to snuggle and hold her and help me, as he did when Zach was born. Not to mention, we will both likely be completely exhausted and up all hours those first days and weeks after her birth as she adjusts to life outside the womb. So, once she comes, we can pretty much kiss his scholastics bye-bye for a little while, most likely. I am not sure how understanding his professors will be. If they allow him to take the exams later, it will likely be only a few days later and will require them rewriting the exams for him. I don’t know that a few days will make any difference in his ability to sleep, focus, study, and succeed. It’s not that I doubt his abilities at all—he has done amazingly well in his scholastics thus far. I just think it’s nearly impossible to expect much from anyone with a newborn for a little while. I should add that Corey’s sweet mother will be here to help out four days after the due date, which will obviously be a huge help. My sister is also flying standby when she gets the news, but sometimes it takes days to get a flight out if there’s no prior notice. So we may be on our own for a few days if we don’t make plans otherwise.

On the other hand, he doesn’t have any exams the week before her due date. While I have no control over whether or not she comes very late—I expect she may come a few days after her due date like Zach did, which is right in the middle of the school-stress time—I CAN control whether we want to have her a few days early. That would allow him to have the week before the exams to study like crazy, then I could be induced the Friday before his big exam week (about 4 days before the due date), he could have the weekend to enjoy the baby, help out, and rest, and also we could ensure that my sister would be here to help.

I am SO hesitant to do this, as it will likely remove the possibility of having a natural birth. Most of the medications and methods used to initiate labor cause more intense than normal contractions, making an epidural more necessary. Also, if the inductions methods do not work within a specific timeframe, and the body is not progressing as needed, a C-section becomes eminent. I have heard of it going both ways with people I know. It is rare that people are able to refrain from medications after elective induction. So that’s my conundrum. Do I give up on my marathon hopes and even increase the risk of a surgical birth to facilitate Corey’s school schedule? Or do I risk his standing in school for a natural birth? I should add that one reason this is such a stress for me is that we have some friends that went through the same thing last year—having a baby in the middle of this same intense trimester that coincides with National Boards—and the husband ended up having to drop out of school!!! I don’t really think that is likely with Corey, but it is a slight possibility, and after all the effort and huge financial undertaking we’ve put into chiropractic school, I don’t really want to risk it.

So, if anyone actually got through this long, boring post and has some expert (or non-expert) advice on the subject, feel free to send it my way. Until then, we will see if I am progressing toward labor at all next Monday. If not, induction may be a little too risky. If so, maybe we’ll choose the least-invasive method(s) of induction—which is_______??? Again, advice mothers!! In the meantime, some prayers that she’ll come right at the perfect time—whatever that is—would be sincerely appreciated!

More Answered Prayers

I feel so very blessed today. Having steady, reliable work has been a little bit of a struggle since it seems the bad economy is finally hitting Dallas. We have been praying sincerely that we would be able to still make ends meet with me working as little as possible so Zach doesn't have to spend much time in daycare. Thankfully and miraculously, I have been blessed with enough work to get us by. Especially amazing is the fact that I know God has heard and answered my specific prayers this week. I have been getting very few days of work lately- one to two days per week, and this week I did not receive any calls to work until Thursday, when they asked me to come in Saturday. I have been praying to be able to earn the maximum amount of money in the minimum amount of time so I can spend more time with Zach. Since I am paid on a commission, some days can be very profitable, and others can be almost a waste of my time (although every little bit helps). So today I was able to earn what I normally make in 2-3 days while Corey was able to stay home and spend some fun time with Zach. It was really hard work for me, but much easier to do before the baby comes than after. I have been able to work some Fridays and Saturdays, which has been great because Corey is able to to provide almost all the childcare these days. I am hoping and praying that I will secure a permanent contract that will allow me to work just these days (or just one of them--as long as I can earn enough!) after the baby is born so that I can still provide for our family while Corey is in school and Corey can spend valuable time with our little ones.

Working has been a difficult decision for me, and I still question it at times. I have come to have a strong testimony that mommas need to be with their babies as much as possible, and that there are fewer exceptions to this rule than most of us realize. I am not at all here to judge other moms who work, but for myself, I have learned that I will only work out of absolute necessity for my family's physical needs, and I will not sacrifice their emotional and spiritual needs for my profession. Thankfully, I enjoy what I do, and am blessed to be able to earn enough to provide in just 1-2 days a week. I know many are not that fortunate, and so many wonderful mothers would love to spend more time with their families but are forced to take on a heavy workload. You women have my total support and admiration for faithfully doing what it takes to get by.

I know that if I were not able to give sufficient time to my family, if my job required too many hours, that I would quit working, stay at home with my children, and trust that God would somehow provide. I've seen it happen in many other families when it didn't seem possible. Why don't I do that now? Well, it could still happen, especially after this little one comes. But as I stated earlier, I am so blessed to be able to provide for us on such a few short hours or days per week, that I do not at this time feel justified in receiving handouts from others while I am physically, emotionally, and spiritually able to work this small amount of time. If I were making minimum wage and having to work 40 hours per week, it would be a different story. I know I would be too exhausted to be the mother and wife I need to be, and wouldn't be capable of adequately providing for my family's more important emotional and spiritual needs. And I am happy for some of my tax money to be helping out those who resposibly choose to be home raising their children rather than letting someone else who doesn't care as much raise their children. I know that, when used honestly and properly, our system can truly help those is need, and am grateful to know it is there if I ever need it.

I admire the many women- many in our own family- who sacrifice so much to be home with their children at such great cost. All of my sisters and sisters-in-law are both extremely talented and well-educated, and not one of them chooses to spend their time working (much) outside the home. None of them are extremely well-off financially. They clip coupons, live frugally, and sometimes have the opportunity to use their talents and training to bring in some extra money. I couldn't be prouder of them, or more grateful for their example. They are nurturing and teaching their children. They are allowing their husbands to learn to nurture and provide for their families. It truly is the Lord's way, and their families will reap spiritual and emotional benefits that far outweigh anything that extra money from working would provide.

For a long time, I really thought I was the exception to the Lord's counsel that mothers stay home with their children. Thankfully, I have been blessed to realize that, while higher education and professions are great and can do much good in the world, nothing can compare to the good that needs to be done in your own home. Again, I am not here to chastise or judge anyone. I am just grateful to have learned this lesson as soon as I did. I look forward to the day when Corey will take over the role of provider for this family, and know he will do such an excellent job of it. He is working so hard in school to gain the skills necessary to do so, and the time he spends with us is packed with joy and meaning. His life revolves around little Zachary, and Zach is equally fond of his daddy! I may always do a little dentistry, but if I don't, who cares? My priority is my family and my service to God. Dentistry is just a job. It is enjoyable, and I do love that I can help others with my education and experience, but I hope I will never allow it to fill me with pride or take my focus from where it should be.

Trip to Idaho and Utah for Christmas

Alright, this will be a little random because of the way I downloaded the photos, but here is a quick recap of our recent trip to Idaho and Utah over the Christmas break:

Here I am at about 31 weeks along in my pregnancy. I have stayed about 7 pounds lighter than I was at the same point with Zach, which I am proud of. I didn't know what to expect with him, and just ate whatever and whenever I felt like it. With this pregnancy, I have exercised much more regularly, and haven't given in to every craving that comes my way. I still eat plenty and give in to more treats than I ought, but I am really trying to stay at about a 25 pound gain, which is what the doctor recommends for normal weight women. With Zach I gained closer to 35, and those last 10 pounds took 5 months to get off, which was really discouraging. I still have 6 weeks at this point, and should be about on track if I gain around one pound per week.

 Can you believe we are sisters?! Look how cute Natalie is!

 Here is my first baby shower, which was held at Tessa's on the 18th. 9 of the Malan granddaughters were present that day, and 2 more came to the shower in Idaho. It was so great to see all those sweet girls, and we had such a great time together!

 We had a Nativity pageant at Nick and Meadow's the week before Christmas with the costumes I bought. It was random and fun. The kids had a good time with it.

 Here are the Alexander siblings- what a handsome bunch! Man, I love these guys!

 Nick, Meadow, Natalie, and I had the special treat of attending a session at the Salt Lake Temple together. It was such a wonderful experience.

 Mom treated us to a super-fun night of bowling at BYU, and we snapped this photo afterward.

 Corey and I made it to Rupert to visit our sweet grandmothers. It was so great to see them again.

 After the first week up north, we headed to Idaho Falls to spend the next week with the Wilhelmsen clan. We had a great time together, and had yet another bowling expedition. This time, it was the in-laws against the outlaws. It was a very close game!

 Look at that hottie mom of mine! This is at the shower that Corey's family threw for me on the 29th. It was so much fun! I got spoiled rotten!

 And on the way back to Utah to catch the plane, we were treated to this lovely Idaho sunset.

We loved our time with friends and family. It will likely be quite awhile until we are able to return, but we always look forward to seeing familiar faces and places again!

Our Little Christmas in Big Texas

Since we were spending Christmas in Utah and Idaho with our families, we decided to have our own little Christmas celebration here in Texas before we left, so we didn't have to cart presents across the country, etc. It was tricky to find time to do it since Corey had finals up until a few hours before we left, but it all worked out well. The night before, we read from the scriptures and used our nativity set to act out the Christmas story with Zach. We also sang some Christmas songs with him. 

 The stockings were hung by the chimney with care... (Wondering whose is whose?!)

 I love the look on his face. It is priceless! 8 bucks for Buzz and Woody plush toys was a hit! He has said several times since then, "I love you, Buzz/Woody. Give me a kiss!" So sweet!! I love this kiddo!

This facial expression is also priceless to me, because it is Zach saying, "Needs batteries," and scrunching up his nose at the cheap, lifeless versions of Buzz and Woody we got him. He is fine with them now, but had recently played with the talking, moving versions at the store, so he knew what he was missing!

 We also got him a rolling Toy Story suitcase that came with a pillow and blanket that he loved and put right to use! ("I go sleep.")

(Thanks so much to Nana and Papa for the Christmas dinero and letting us buy the gifts here so we didn't have to pack them!)

 Can you tell how thrilled Corey is to open his giant, hand (or even life)-saving, Christmas surprises?! They will sure give me some peace of mind, though! (He is actually using them as I am posting this blog. I want to be taking a nap while Zach is also napping, but am afraid to leave him alone while working on the car again!)

 What can I say, other than "Like father, like son," right? Zach adores this new truck that comes with tools he can use to remove and replace the tires. I might need to get him some mini-tire chocks and jack stands so he learns how to do it safely from a young age!

 It was a fun and memorable little Christmas to share as a family.